Shock News : Human Breath Contains 40,000 ppm CO2

That is over 100 times the safe limit of 350 ppm. Call in the EPA and get all that breathing extinguished.

About stevengoddard

Just having fun
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14 Responses to Shock News : Human Breath Contains 40,000 ppm CO2

  1. suyts says:

    lol, this is an outrage! Forget the EPA!!!! Call FEMA!!!!

  2. Owen says:

    Steven, I love your wit, love your sarcasm, love your ridicule of the global warming religion. You’re one of the funniest AND informative people on the entire internet. Thanks for doing what you do.

  3. PhilJourdan says:

    News Flash – Surgeon General Bans Kissing as Hazardous to your Health! Film at 11.

  4. Old Goat says:

    It’s no joking matter. All that personally exhaled CO2 will have to be collected, not allowed into the atmosphere at large, and buried in holes in the ground.

    Soon everyone will be required to be in possession of a permit to breathe out, will be taxed on the CO2 content, and will need to carry portable apparatus to collect this dreadful, toxic gas, and dispose of it in the prescribed manner.

    Those who refuse to participate will be lawfully (and forcibly, if required) deprived of oxygen, after which they will be buried in unconsecrated ground. Any noxious gases issuing from their rotting corpses will be measured, and the costs of disposal levied upon their living relatives.

    Is it worth lving at all, with these loonies in control?

    • Al Gored says:

      Yes, we need an ‘elaborate system of tubes’ connecting to each mouth breather to centralized carbon sequestration facility… and of course another one for methane.

      If we really cared about the planet we would all volunteer for duty on hamster wheels to produce ‘green’ electricity to compensate for the unbearable guilt of being CO2 emitters.

      I’m sure the missionaries at the EPA would gladly administer the whips to keep the wheels turning, for our own good.

      • Disillusioned says:

        Yes. A Hamster wheel green energy facility is the ideal situation to both make energy and to sequester the 38,000 ppm CO2 from every exhalation.

        But, to heck with volunteerism. The President should declare martial law (national emergency allows for such) and make it mandatory. Running machines would make ideal hamster wheels – an easy conversion. AAMOF, CO2 sequestration masks and electricity generation should be mandatory on every elliptical, running and stairstep machine at the gym.

        Come to think of it, everyone should be made to walk/peddle around with portable sequestration masks and electricity generators. We might as well attach collection bags to the rear end of cattle also – can’t forget about methane.

  5. Al Gored says:

    This explains everything. Now I understand why my body temperature is usually higher than the air around me. Its the CO2!

  6. Andy Weiss says:

    Straight, white males should be prohibited from breathing!!! That is the only way to save the planet.

  7. Juergen says:

    Call Michael E. Mann. The world population increasing shows a hockey stick.

  8. Ganavion says:

    Breathing is dangerous, men should be killed to save the planet !
    ps
    Are we sure that other animals don’t breathe ?

  9. teo says:

    You’ve really convinced me. I’m going to suicide!!!

  10. tory says:

    my ppm is 7024 is that horrible bad good, ok

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