Wyoming Announces New Bear Hunting Regulations

Progressives tell us that Zimmerman hunted down Martin and killed him in cold blood.

In honor of his memory, Wyoming is introducing new bear hunting regulations requiring that all hunters lie down on the ground underneath the Griz, and allow the bear to take repeated swipes at the hunter’s face prior to the hunter shooting the bear with a medium caliber handgun.

The hunter must be able to prove that they were nearly dead prior to firing the pistol.

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8 Responses to Wyoming Announces New Bear Hunting Regulations

  1. Gamecock says:

    In a related story, the NPS reminds visitors at Yellowstone that taking pictures of adult bears is prohibited; only cubs can be photographed.

  2. leftinbrooklyn says:

    And even those regulations on self defense are not permitted if you thought the bear might be a bear.

  3. There Is No Substitute for Victory says:

    Bulletin: sarc.
    This just in from the National Park Service! Starting today photographing bear cubs will become an illegal activity on all NPS lands.

    The PPP (that’s Progressives in Pursuit of Personification) arm of the NPS Police now deem photographing bear cubs as a form of pedophilia. So be sure to carry a fly swatter and a few pairs of Rompers in various sizes with you when you visit Yellow Stone this Summer. The Rompers are to dress the cute little bear cubs in so that you may photograph them, and the fly swat is so you can keep the “Mama Grizzly” (remember her?) at bay while you dress her cubs in training paints. Remember now, DON’T feed the bears!!!

  4. There Is No Substitute for Victory says:

    Gamecock, this just in from the National Park Service!:
    Starting today photographing bear cubs will become an illegal activity on all NPS lands.

    The Timothy Treadwell chapter of the PPP (Progressives in Pursuit of Personification) arm of the NPS Police now deem photographing naked bear cubs as a form of pedophilia. So be sure to carry a fly swatter and a few pairs of Rompers in various sizes with you when you visit Yellow Stone this Summer. The Rompers are to dress the cute little bear cubs in so that you may photograph them, and the fly swat is so that you can keep the “Mama Grizzly” (remember her?) at bay while you dress her cubs in training pants. Remember now to use your fly swatter liberally, so that you DON’T end up feeding the bears like Timothy Treadwell.

  5. gator69 says:

    And here I thought that they would now have the right to arm bears. 😉

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