Top Reasons To Vote Democratic

► I vote Democrat because I think it’s better to pay billions of dollars to people who hate us rather than drill for our own oil, because it might upset some endangered beetle or gopher.
► I vote Democrat because I believe it is okay if liberal activist judges rewrite the Constitution to suit some fringe kooks, who would otherwise never get their agenda past the voters.
► I vote Democrat because I believe that corporate America should not be allowed to make profits for themselves or their shareholders. They need to break even and give the rest to the federal government for redistribution.
► I vote Democrat because I’m not concerned about millions of babies being aborted, so long as we keep all of the murderers on death row alive.
► I vote Democrat because I believe it’s okay if my Nobel Peace Prize winning President uses drones to assassinate people, as long as we don’t use torture.
► I vote Democrat because I believe people, who can’t accurately tell us if it will rain on Friday, can predict the polar ice caps will melt away in ten years if I don’t start driving a Chevy Volt.
► I vote Democrat because Freedom of Speech is not as important as preventing people from being offended.
► I vote Democrat because I believe the oil companies’ profit of 3% on a gallon of gas is obscene, but the federal government taxing that same gallon of gas at 15%isn’t obscene.
► I vote Democrat because I believe a moment of silent prayer at the beginning of the school day constitutes government indoctrination and an intrusion on parental authority ….. but sex education, condom distribution and multiculturalism are all values-neutral.
► I vote Democrat because I agonize over threats to the natural environment from CO2, acid rain and toxic waste ….. but I am totally oblivious of the threats to our social environment from pornography, promiscuity and family dissolution.
► I vote Democrat because I believe lazy, uneducated stoners should have just as big a say in running our country as entrepreneurs who risk everything and work 70 hours per week. 
► I vote Democrat because I don’t like guns ….. so no one else should be allowed to own one.
► I vote Democrat because I see absolutely no correlation between welfare and the rise of illegitimacy.
► I vote Democrat because I see absolutely no correlation between judicial leniency and surging crime rates.
► I vote Democrat because I believe marriage is obsolete, except for homosexuals.
► I vote Democrat because I think AIDS is spread by insufficient funding.
► I vote Democrat because I think “fairness” is far more important than freedom.
► I vote Democrat because I think an “equal outcome” is far more important than equal opportunity.
And lastly, I vote Democrat because I’m convinced that government programs are the solution to the human condition, NOT freedom

Nancy Pelosi absent for CR vote – Jake Sherman and John Bresnahan – POLITICO.com

About stevengoddard

Just having fun
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13 Responses to Top Reasons To Vote Democratic

  1. Reblogged this on Power To The People and commented:
    I vote Democrat because I feel good about “saving the earth” from Climate Change. Never mind the price is human servitude and poverty and who cares if the Climate Models were wrong, the important thing is that I feel good about myself.

  2. EW3 says:

    Living in MA and having dated many different women over the last 30 years since I moved here, I can say without a doubt that those that vote for Dems think Republicans are evil. Most can not even explain why Dems are good and Pubs are bad, and they get pissed when you ask them questions like that.

    Just look at the stigmatization of the Tea Party. According to Cooky Roberts they are racists.

  3. Chewer says:

    Let’s not forget, Democrats enjoy when their president has direct talks with the Iranian President (Rouhani), the guy that helped overthrow the Shaw, organized and funded terrorist activity that killed Americans around the world and is the moderate who’s been recorded in his full hatred of the U.S. and all western cultures.
    The Iranians have already produced several nuclear warheads and it is now too late for diplomacy and our President knows that, and is quite happy with his deceitful work over the past five years…
    It’ll be mission accomplished for 0 sooner than you think!

  4. tom0mason says:

    I vote Democrat ’cause they gimme this free phone like, OK.

  5. Being a socialist means you never have to say you’re sorry, because I’m always right about everything.

  6. Free Fone says:

    I vote Democrat because I hate white people.
    (“Just Kidding”).

  7. Hansen says:

    awesome list

  8. scizzorbill says:

    I vote Democrat because I am a liberal, and cannot think critically as it gives me a headache just like when I try to use reason, logic, and common sense. I use emotions and common non sense, much easier, plus I get free gubmint stuff.

  9. Emanuelle Goldstein says:

    “I vote Democrat because I believe marriage is obsolete, except for homosexuals.” Thank you so much for this! I worked with a Democrat woman at the Univ. of California (she had been an intern for Ted Kennedy) who was a rabid crusader against marriage–proudly refusing to marry the father of her baby because marriage is a “useless, old-fashioned institution.” She was even written up as a heroine in several national publications.

    However, she was also a rabid crusader for the right for gays to marry. It occurred to me that she was compelled to crusade against anything that went against the “Establishment.” In her honor I will add:

    “I vote Democrat because I can’t see my own hypocrisy”
    “I vote Democrat because I celebrate my hypocrisy.”

  10. aeroguy48 says:

    I voted Democrat in the 2008 primaries here in Texas to follow Rush Limbauh’s operation chaos. It did not work. Even though Hillary got more votes, The state dems ‘deemed’ obama won

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